Esse quam videri

Saturday, December 13, 2014

11:22PM 13/12/2014

Slowly, I'm dissociating myself from people around me. I'm pulling back my feeling, hiding it deep inside while putting on a plastic smile.

It just......happens. There's no reason, no cause. Only effect this time.

No, I'm not emo. I'm perfectly fine. Things have become stagnant but it's not bad. It's just a routine day after day. Maybe it's boredom or emptiness or whatever shennanigan but it's definitely not me been emotional.

This too shall pass, just like my other phases as well. Life has up and down and sometimes, it's not even there. It breaks from the circle and float into nothingness. That's when u feel this emptiness, like life itself has been sucked out of u.

U know, the feeling like u have float out of ur body and u are looking down at urself from above. It gives u an eerie and calmness but not the good kind of calmness. It's calm calm, like u don't care kind of calm. Maybe it's not really calmness. Maybe it's indifference.

Yeah, it's indifference and also oblivious. It's different, these two. Indifference means u still aware of ur surrounding but u choose not to be bothered by it while oblivious is one when u just space out and things just brush against u without leaving a mark.

I don't know what I'm babbling about now. It just makes no sense to me but I still gonna post this up.

Love
nobody

6 comments:

  1. you need setraline or lora or not?

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    Replies
    1. i still got that two tablet of setraline lo. I'll take that in the event of emergency LOL

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    2. setraline is long term babe

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  2. that makes two of us. I am feeling the same feeling as you do now.
    It's evidently has shown that we are easily forgotten.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. that's the basic trait of human, we forget. Sometimes we even forget who we are and what's important. Wish u a good end for the year and a fresh beginning =)

      Delete
    2. bitch! i dont forget you k~!

      Delete